Tremont Turkey Festivus…

a Festivus for the Rest-of-us!

If you can’t tell by the Seinfeld reference, Tina is NOT blogging this entry! I’m Allison, Tina’s co-worker/sometimes friend, and since I have a Bachelor’s degree in Journalism (which is also known as being a Starbucks barista or Admissions Counselor—get it, journalism grads don’t have jobs?), Tina asked me to tackle the Tremont Turkey Festival this weekend! I happily complied, because as a life-long central Illinoisan, I’ve developed a sincere appreciation for small-town, Midwestern festivals (cheap food and unbelievable people-watching).

Where else can you win prizes for frozen-turkey-tossing-prowess?!?!

Background on the Fest: in 1966, the Tremont Turkey Festival was created to raise monies for a swimming pool. At that time, around 5,000 people attended Turkey Fest; today, over 50,000 people will swarm the Tremont Park like zombies whose thirst can only be quenched by turkey sandwiches and strawberry shortcake.

I’m pretty sure all 50,000 were trying to find seats in this pavilion.

Our first stop at TF:2K11 was, of course, the food pavilions. Really, there are only two foods at Turkey Fest: turkey, and other things that won’t taste better than turkey, so don’t bother. My main squeeze and I grabbed three sandwiches, a couple of soda pops, and plopped down to pound it all. Jeff and I have different approaches to meat: I view it as a necessary fuel that allows my anemic self to run, and Jeff views it as an adversary that MUST BE DESTROYED.

The hunter stalks his prey…

…prepares his war face…

IT’S A FIGHT TO THE DEATH!

After my gem finished his food, we were ready to be entertained. First stop was the Merchants’ Tent. For those of you who don’t know, the Merchants’ Tent (they forget that possessive apostrophe and IT TICKS ME OFF) is full of siding, roofing, tractor, newspaper, Scentsy, and Mary Kay proprietors, all looking to sell their wares. I like to go because the Tazewell County Democrats and Tazewell County Republicans are always represented, and I know one day, if I’m a good girl, I will get to watch middle-aged, overweight politicians brawl. This Merchants’ Tent had a surprise in store for me…the Tremont High School FIRST Robotics Team had a table!

This robot (or “bot” if you’re no nOOb) placed 3rd in a national competition @ the FIRST Robotics Symposium in St. Louis.

I could tell the story of how the energetic student representing Tremont’s FIRST Team suckered me into buying a $20 lightbulb (which I maintain was a donation, and my husband views as another example of my big heart/dumb brain), but that’s for another day…

After we said good-bye to my new friends in the Tremont HS FIRST Team, we headed to the “mainstage” for a recital. As mandated by law, there were cute little girls in sequiny costumes dancing songs like “Blue Suede Shoes,” which we totally enjoyed. Then the high schoolers came on the stage….in another life, my hubs was a real life GLEE’er, so he thinks he knows a thing or two. This was his expression to the men’s a capella group singing a personal fave of mine, Toto’s “Africa.”

The face…

The group…

and in their defense, I didn’t think they were that bad considering the sound quality was awful, and I’m pretty sure most of the audience was distracted by the similarities between these guys and BSB. At any rate, the little kids were a-dor-able, and we now know the arts are alive and well in Tremont, IL!

At this point we concluded there was just one more thing we needed from TF2K11: strawberry shortcake!

Anatomy of a feast:

Om…

Nom.

The best things in life are usually pretty simple.

Breakdown of costs:

Three turkey sandwiches & two sodas: $13.50

One lightbulb (that won’t burn out FOR NINE YEARS, JEFF.): $20

One strawberry shortcake: $3.50

Total cost (minus my dignity): $37.00

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2 comments

  1. I heartily support the turkey fest, but seems that you guys didn’t partake in the true treat it has to offer.

    Good guest blogger, would read again.

  2. I can say, without a doubt, my life is not as cheery as it once was because Tina and Allison aren’t in it every day. Tina, this page is bookmarked on my browser. It’s the third thing I check when I come home from work – email, Seattle Theatre Puget Sound audition page, and TP the Town. I love it and you!

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